Goodbye my lover No More

Its been a month since I last posted. It has also been a month since I last spoke to him. When I started this blog I needed it to be an outlet for my fears of why our relationship would end. The love and passion I talked about was real, the whole scenario was not.
A month ago, on Valentines Day, he decided to end it, and I haven't been able to update or even read this blog, or any love story blog.
I promised my self ages ago that I will never fall in love, no one is worth it, and I just can't handle the pain. Then I met him. He was perfect, everything about him was perfect, and I loved him with every inch of my being. I let go of my "never fall in love" stuff and fell deep and hard for him. I loved the way his hands would caress my hands. I loved the way his eyes looked at me. I loved his voice, the way he laughed, his beautiful smile, his smell, his body, his everything.
I gave him my heart and everything that went with it and now its over. Writing this is probably the hardest thing to do, because I have been trying to forget him and I just cant. 26 days of heart wrenching pain, crying when I wake up and crying when I sleep. For a whole week every little thing made my eyes tear, now its just when I remember him I cry.
I tried to forget him, think of all his negatives, but to me there was none, I never found anything negative about him. Sometimes I'll be walking and I smell his cologne and the tears just flood my eyes. Or i'll be listening to music, and the song reminds me of the days we were together and I feel its hard to breathe.
I am trying to finish this post before anyone wakes up cuz with every letter I type the tears just keep flowing.
I miss him so much, sometimes I seem to be laughing and having a good time, but deep down inside I feel like someone is squeezing my heart.
I tried to delete our and his pictures off my computer and my phone but I cant get my self to do it. Although I stopped looking at them to minimize the pain, I cant delete them. No matter how much I'm itching for it, I stopped watching the video I made for our 2 year anniversary. I put pictures we had together, and some of us alone, and at the end videos that he didn't know I made with the song "Hadeya" by rashid playing in the background.
I tried everything to forget. I surrounded my self with my friends, I went shopping, started cooking again, dressed up and went out,but nothing is working! NOTHING!
I MISS HIM! I miss his txt msgs, I miss hearing his voice, I miss knowing that he loves me. I know we'll never get back together, I am trying to not get my hopes up. Its already been a month, so I will try to forget. Maybe there will come a day when I can delete his old messages on my fone, or his pictures, and maybe there will come a day when I won't cry thinking of him. I highly doubt its anytime soon.